Church Losing Attraction as Place to Get a Spouse

Reporter

The church is suffering – and so are relationships and love.

So much that many young men and women looking to marry are having to look outside – and not inside the church.

Many claim that the church is drunk with immorality, that they would rather look for men or women in bars.

“I don’t like pretentious people. The church is full of them, and I don’t like it,” Naima Koki told Mwanahabari.

This seems to be a common feeling across many Kenyans.

Decent church men

According to Naima, she has dated over 10 men, decent church-going men, and all of them hurt her bad.

“I had this man I met in church, a staunch choirman, but who loved women. I came to learn that he was juggling between three women, and that I was just one of them,” said Naima.

“The choir people, and gospel musicians are the worst. They move around smashing young girls left right and center, and pretending to serve God during the day. I would rather find a man out there, in a club and see how to convert them,” she added.

Men also prefer looking outside

The feeling seems to be mutual, as some men also prefer looking outside, like Ken.

Ken used to be a gospel musician, and ‘he did a lot’ with his talent.

“Sometimes the girls just came to me, offering themselves to me and my team. I was young, and yes, I did sleep with many of them,” he says.

“I often guilty, especially standing in front of the pulpit to sing to the Lord. I would sing and sometime my eyes would meet with those of the girl I had slept with the previous night. It was bad I had to quit church,” says Ken who now plays secular music.

No. Never

“I would rather cheat openly as a secular musician, than pretend in the house of God,” he said.

Asked if he would consider marrying a woman from the church, Ken says NO, NEVER.

According to Ken. he knows many marriages that were consummated inside the church, but have collapsed because of infidelity between partners.

There is a feeling that the Kenyan gospel music industry is an ‘industry’ and not a ministry.

The recent outburst by comedian Eric Omondi only seems to tell half the story.

There are many good people in Church

A pastor who spoke to Mwanahabari said that the church has not changed, but the people have changed, and become more sinful.

“I cannot blame the church. It is the people who have become so bold that they sin right inside the church,” said the pastor.

He, however, noted that there are many genuine and honest people in the church.

“Running out there to look for a spouse may not be a solution. Let us be honest people, love one another and be honest in our dealings with God and man,” he said.